C4Y
See for Yourself website was started in 2018 as a resource for teens, young men, parents and older men wanting more information regarding sexuality and sexual issues
It’s difficult to get out of pornobation’s grip
(watching porn and masturbating)
Because pornobation correlate perfectly with your natural, regular sexual drive and desire for sex.
Every time you masturbate with any kind of focused attention on any sexualized imaginations, fantasies or images (persons/videos/pictures) then you make that bond of what you focus on stronger and stronger…
…it’s like applying super glue again and again to something you actually want UNSTUCK
“you say, “I am allowed to do anything”—but not everything is good for you. and even though “I am allowed to do anything,” I must not become a slave to anything
run from sexual sin! no other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. for sexual immorality is a sin against your own body” 1Cor 6:12+18
SIN is ‘to miss the mark’
It's like shooting an arrow but completely missing the target.
Our bodies have a functional purpose, and if we don’t use them the right way, we’re not hitting that purpose. That’s why it’s important to understand how to use our bodies and energy in the way they were meant to be used.
how to
STOP
pornobation
submit to God’s moral standards
With ‘submit to God’s moral standards’ I don’t mean read your Bible more, pray more, go to Church more or get more counselling…
I mean you realize that God’s moral code is confronting you of something you are about to do…
…is doing
or was doing in the past and He wants you to deal with it!
when you experience this, you have two choices!
IGNORE His Ways
or SUBMIT to His Ways
When you submit…
He expect you to:
a. Forgive those who hurt you.
Whether it's a family member, a friend, or someone you trusted. Maybe they abused you, neglected you, lied to you, used you, or made you feel like you didn’t matter.
Maybe they stole from you or did something that really hurt. No matter what it was, forgiveness isn’t about saying it was okay—it’s about letting go so it doesn’t control you anymore.
b. Be honest about the secret things you’ve done.
Especially if you’re caught up in sexual mistakes or living a double life.
Don’t keep it hidden—bring it into the open.
Humble yourself and talk to someone you trust, someone who can help you or has been through the same struggles and made it through.
2. take courage and ask for HELP
Reach out to a godly counsellor or mentor who understands sexual struggles and has overcome them.
Someone who can guide you through the process of breaking free. If you're a teen, you’ll need your dad, or a trusted adult man, or a strong brother in Christ to support you.
Overcoming this won’t be easy—it usually gets harder before it gets better—but you don’t have to do it alone.
3. be ACCOUNTABLE
Stay accountable—it will change your life for the better. You can’t keep secrets or hide the things you’ve done.
Opening up about your struggles might feel scary or even humiliating but keeping them in the dark only gives them more power over you.
Secrets trap you in shame and pull you deeper into unhealthy habits. But when you choose honesty and openness, you’ll find real support and healing. And as you grow, your other relationships will get stronger too.
4. STOP contact with pornography
Cut off all contact with pornography—completely. This includes everything: soft or hardcore porn, pictures, stories, animations, music, and even conversations with friends who watch or talk about it.
Delete and block every kind of media or message you’ve saved or received. Clean up anything connected to it on your devices.
Next, install a filter or blocking app to keep explicit content out.
It’s best to have someone you trust—like your dad or an accountability partner—manage it for you. If the app allows, set time limits to block the internet during the times you’re most tempted to watch porn or similar content.
5. RENEW your mind
We need the best information available about addiction, the shame cycle, and how to break free from the physical, emotional, and spiritual bondage.
Engaging in porn over months or years builds strong patterns in our brains and affects how we handle stress, relaxation, boredom, loneliness, emotional and physical comfort, and our sexual desires.
It becomes a way to escape difficult situations.
Instead of developing life skills—which take effort, time, and energy to learn—we often turn to the quick, easy fix of porn to cope.
6. NORMALIZE masturbating
At first, quitting masturbation may not be easy. Difficulty depends on how often you act-out, how long each session was and for how many years.
You might find that you struggle to masturbate without pornography—maybe you don’t get as aroused, or it doesn’t feel the same. This is completely normal.
Over time, your brain and body will adjust, and things will feel natural and normal sexual pleasure will return again.
Don’t assume something is broken with your sexuality and fall back to old habits—think of it as giving your mind and body time to ‘reset’ to normal again.
For many young and older men, stopping masturbation completely can be difficult.
Some people are able to stop right away, and we respect their effort and success. Others, like me, needed more time to break the habit—and that’s okay too.
refer to ‘struggling with masturbation‘ for a more detailed explanation
7. CONTRIBUTE
Your journey and the challenges you’ve overcome can inspire and support others who are still struggling.
Because you’ve been through it yourself or on your journey towards freedom, you can be a great help and accountability partner to a friend who wants to break free.
Don’t be afraid to share both your successes and setbacks—when we open up, we all learn and grow together.
“don’t you realize that those who do wrong will not inherit the Kingdom of God? don’t fool yourselves. those who indulge in sexual sin, or who worship idols, or commit adultery, or are male prostitutes, or practice homosexuality, or are thieves, or greedy people, or drunkards, or are abusive, or cheat people—none of these will inherit the Kingdom of God.
some of you were once like that!
but you were cleansed; you were made holy; you were made right with God by calling on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God” 1Cor 6:9-11
see how to CONFESS ADULTERY
TEENS, if you can, talk to your parents about your struggles.
They were once your age and may have faced similar challenges.
If that’s not possible, or if you’re an adult
seek out a wise and trustworthy mentor or counselor. Ask God to guide you to the right person who can support you on this journey.
VULNERABLE times
There will be moments when old habits try to pull you back.
Being aware of these triggers can help you stay in control:
Memories & Triggers – A song, a place, or even a random thought can bring back memories of past experiences, making you want to go back. Stay strong—these moments will pass.
After a Break – If you’ve gone a while without acting out, the urge might hit hard. You might feel like you need that release or want to check if everything still works. Remind yourself why you started this journey.
Stress & Pressure – Exams, responsibilities, or tough emotions can make you crave an escape. But giving in won’t fix anything—it only adds to the struggle. Try out and commit to healthier ways to cope.
After Stress Is Gone – Once the pressure fades, you might feel like rewarding yourself. Or if you slipped once, you might think, “Well, I already messed up, so why not keep going?” Don’t fall for that lie. One mistake doesn’t have to turn into a cycle again.
Boredom – When there’s nothing to do—on weekends, late at night, or during holidays—it’s easy to slip into bad habits. Keep yourself busy with things that make you better, not things that hold you back. Don’t be afraid of boredom - it’s a key for creativity!
Loneliness & Longing – Sometimes, it feels like you lost a best friend—the thing that was always there to comfort you. But that ‘friend’ did more harm than good. Let go and move forward. It’s your opportunity for real face to face connection.
Emotional Struggles – Feeling down, frustrated, or even empty can make you want to feel something again. But don’t numb your emotions—face them and grow stronger. The longer you endure the numbness, the faster it will heal, and you will start feeling pleasure and other different emotions again.
Dreams – Sometimes, lustful dreams, especially when you experience ‘wet’-dreams again can wake up old urges, making it feel like your body is working against you. Remember it will take time to purify your dreams as well. Don’t be discouraged, it’s part of your journey to become sexually pure again.
These moments will come, but they don’t have to control you.
Stay aware, stay strong, and keep moving forward.
Cyberbullying, Sextortion, Sexual Grooming, Gaming & Inappropriate online Content HERE
important!
This journey might feel overwhelming at times, but don’t give up!
If you push through the tough moments, you’ll start to feel more and more freedom.
The struggles you’re facing now won’t last forever—the intensity will fade, and it will get easier. One day, you’ll reach a point where you won’t even want to go back to those habits.